Human and its complexity.

The more people I meet, the more I love my dog. -Mark Twain.

Humans are actually pretty scary creatures because of its complexity, and for everything that is complex, it is hard to explain and hard to understand. I dream of a simple world with less schematic people but then I realized that my world is so complex because I think in such complexity and that caused such extensive suffering and evaporating happiness. And the greatest enemy is in within, perhaps is the way I think that caused me so much misery and I trap myself in such agony.

Maybe I should ask, "Do I need to be happy in my life?" or I am actually so insecure that making people around me happy is the only way to make myself feel remotely happy? and I am actually so fearful that escaping is my only solution, giving infinite excuses to support my getaway yet soon realizing that escaping is never a solution, I end up escaping from reality to another momentary fantasy, stuck and trapped.

I soon realized that the mean and sarcastic part of me is a just way to conceal the insecurity within and the complexity of it is boundless, needless to say that feeling is such subjective thing that plays such important role in life yet why do I put such essential thing on the hands and behaviors of other people in my life and react so pitifully? But how do I control such subjective thing to enhance the happiness?

Life is a learning process, you never make mistake, you only learn from bad example and experience.
So don't make promise when you are happy, or if promises are made never held too much emotion on it.